theonlywayismelbourne

Blogging from Down Under

Where has my child gone?

Has anyone seen my child?

His name is Oliver but he is affectionately referred to as ‘the Bear’, Oli-Bear and various derivatives there of.

I am trying to re-trace my steps to see where I might have mislaid him, and I think it was somewhere between 25th July and 39,000 feet.

The thing is, he has just disappeared, I know I know, I should have been taking more care of him and made sure I knew where he was at all times. I mean I couldn’t have been more prepared for the eventuality of his getting lost, when we were travelling, if anything I was over prepared, I had a baby back pack, some froggy reins, bright clothing, an ID bracelet, the lot. I seem to have taken my eye off the ball somewhat since then though, hence my present dilemma.

You see, since landing in the Southern Hemisphere, my once lovely, well behaved, cute child seems to have disappeared and been replaced with someone elses child, you know the child I mean? The child that bites, screams,  squirms, chucking themself on the floor at the merest hint of not getting their own way, the child whose parent is desperately attempting to control their wayward urchin while trying not to draw attention to the already horrendous situation they are in, at the same time trying to drag screaming child up from their lying position on the floor without pulling said childs arm out of its socket. All this taking place while the other parents look on with a mixture of disdain and pity, basking in their obviously superior parenting skills as their own offspring toddles over to plant a delicate kiss on their perfectly made up face.

That child.

So if I am going to make any friends here, I could really do with finding my own child again ASAP and re-uniting the one I seem to have acquired with his own parents, who I am sure would be beyond delighted to have him back.

Is there anyone who can help me?  Has anyone seen him? Please, please let me know . . . .

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2 thoughts on “Where has my child gone?

  1. You took Owen by mistake x

  2. Oh dear, poor you! Best policy and considering you have little or no furniture or belongings that he can hurt himself on, is put him in a safe place and ignore him. Naughty steps don’t work at his age, honestly they don’t because you are still there and fighting to keep them sat on it. Haze uses her porch because she can keep an eye on madam, when she calms down she can come out. That or in the pushchair, I know this is difficult with a) an ironing board or b) an eel but if you strap them in and turn them away from you they can then scream until the cows come home without getting at you. If its that loud push him into another room so you can have some timeout too and defuse the situation. Sounds like he is defintely testing the water! I think the term terrible twos should be changed to awful ones or something, they seem to hit that milestone much earlier than two these days! Trying to appease just doesn’t work. So decide how you (and Dad) are going to handle it and stick with it, its tough when you are little and don’t get your own way lol xxx

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