Note to self – Tidy up my knickers!
This Friday was husbs work Christmas Do and unlike every other year when I am told politely yet firmly that partners of any kind are absolutely forbidden from attending, this one was a little different in that finally I could break free from my dutiful wifely shackles and attend the Christmas Party.
The reason for this change was twofold, firstly the office in Australia is very small consisting of around 15 people so the partners boost the numbers and secondly which is most likely to be the reason; as I go into the office sporadically husb could not pretend partners were not invited to this one (not that I am suggesting he has been economical with the truth on previous occasions of course) as colleagues would ask in conversation if I was attending he couldn’t really keep this one quiet!
I was very excited about it and also nervous at the same time.
Excited because I don’t go out – like ever! (Well obviously if you discount when I went out 2 days earlier with my Muddy Melbourne Girls and when I went out a few weeks ago with fast running friend and then the time I went out with husb for our anniversary but that doesn’t count. Like I said I NEVER go out.
Nervous because this wasn’t any old night out this was the first works night out I have been on since moving here and the pressure to have a good time, make a good impression in a social setting and not get too drunk and make a fool of myself and husb was immense.
So with this pressure on my young shoulders I set about getting ready for the big event.
Husb had to be at the office early so that the team could do a surprise activity together (to be taken in a very cool stretch Hummer)
and then the partners were to meet at the venue for the meal at 1.30pm. Now getting ready for a night out at the best of times takes me a while, but attempting to do it while there is a small child attempting to eat my (switched on) hair straighteners, takes this to another level and of all the times for stuff to go wrong in the house, today had to be the day. Trying to entertain a small child at the same time as teasing my hair to perfection (which ended up being pointless as it was chucking it down so I arrived looking like Monica ‘its the humidity’ from ‘friends’) meant it was a losing battle.
Anyway back to the story.
I had just stepped out of the shower, towel on, wet hair, no makeup about to begin the tanning ritual. As I washed my hands the tap decided that was the moment it would choose to refuse to switch off. Rather like the door incident when I first arrived it would not switch off. I wrenched at it, pulled it, tried pliers everything but it just wouldn’t budge. I must have been there for a good 15 mins in just a towel with dripping wet hair with a small child using the bed as a trampoline while repeatedly shouting “door” (his word of the month) fighting with the hot tap, all the while the minutes ticking by on the clock.
What could I do? I couldn’t leave the house for who knows how long with the hot tap gushing could I? I really didn’t want to get our landlady involved as I knew she would worry and there would be no way I could get to husbs party on time. I decided on switching the mains water off, except I didn’t know where it was and when I finally found it some 10 minuted later, I had to enlist the services of next door neighbours English dad to come and yank it, all while landlady hung around watching over everything with an eagle eye. Did I mention she lives across the road and came to see why I was standing in the garden with only a dressing gown on!
I was a bit perturbed when she insisted on coming upstairs to the en-suite to see what the problem was and I ran upstairs ahead of her hastily chucking my lady pants under the bed and sweeping up husbs boxers. My mortification intensified as the Bear ran around the bedroom taking great delight in scooping them up and running up and down the landing with them. Oh the shame.
Anyway, tap temporarily fixed, the Bear and I legged it round to my friends in the rain (looking good if I may say in my flipflop, floaty skirt, bright pink macintosh combo- the coat didnt make it to the do). So that I could drop him off and be on my merry way.
Arriving seconds before my taxi, I garbled a list of unintelligible instructions while asking for shoe advice and I was out of the door on my way to my night of freedom.
I skipped to the taxi and thinking my excitement must surely be contagious this festive season I sang out a cheerful hello to the taxi driver.
It wasn’t contagious.
I tried to get into the taxi on the drivers side only to see the largest man I have ever seen driving the taxi with his seat so far back to accommodate his bulk I couldn’t get in behind him.
I wedged myself into the other seat and settled back for the short journey to St Kilda, closing my eyes for a little eye rest before I arrived . . . .
this was not to be, it started with
“how the hell do I get out of here then”, followed by “which way now” and a few minutes later “whereabouts is it again?” and finally ending in “do you want me to drop you right outside the door?”
Erm Yes if it is not too much trouble Mr Taxi Driver who earns his living taking people to where they have asked to go.
A taxi driver who had no idea where he was going meaning that I had to direct him having only been here a few months, and then wondering aloud if he needed to take me the whole distance of my journey. Brilliant – you wouldn’t get that with London Cabbies! (although to be fair they would just refuse to let you into the taxi at all, let alone take you south of the river) – although at least they know where they are going if you are lucky enough to manage to get in one.
So that’s how the day started. . .
Christmas Party in the middle . . .
Ending with another taxi’s refusal to take me all the way home.
Finishing with a very sore head the next day as I couldn’t drink any water as water mains turned off.
Don’t think I embarrassed husb but couldn’t be sure.
Today I am linking up with Essentially Jess for I Blog On Tuesday’s for the last one of the year. Hopefully I will get myself more organised and do it properly next year!