A place were no-one can hear you scream
We headed off Down the Great Ocean Road again this weekend full of anticipation of what the weekend would bring. Husb was entered into the Great Ocean Road half marathon. Having spent weeks training to get his distances up, we were both looking forward to a fun filled weekend enjoying the idyllic countryside around Apollo Bay and the shipwreck coast before husb took on the Half Marathon challenge on the Sunday.
Now I could tell you what a fabulous time we had and what a beautiful place we stayed in and how relaxing it was to be together as a family enjoying it all, but I am all about telling it like it is here at theonlywayismelbourne. I wouldn’t want to insult my readers intelligence so I am going to tell the truth, because unlike Jack Nicholson I think ‘you CAN handle the truth’
With hindsight I have since realised that questions should have been raised when we became aware that the place that we were going to be staying was in fact, the only place available this particular weekend due to the Marathon festival. Every single place from Lorne right the way down to Kennet River and beyond was booked up ages ago. So instead of questioning why it was available in the first place and then when we found out the price, questioning why it was that cheap, we instead high fived each other and rushed ahead to book it before some other ‘lucky’ punter got in before us.
They say first impressions count.
Arriving at nearly 7pm in the pitch black having negotiated driving rain, that pesky Hitchcockian fog again, miles and miles up into the dark, forboding forest, getting further and further away from the civilisation of Apollo Bay, up almost vertical dirt tracks, with deadly precipices on each side with only a small piece of wire to protect us from an imminent rolling down the hill death, we almost arrived.
Just one more very slippy hairpin bend to negotiate and we were on the home straight on the driveway up to the house. We inched our way slowly up the unwelcoming drive only to be greeted with this
I would have taken the pic when we first saw it in the dark but frankly I was too scared to move in case this was a booby trap of some kind like they do in the movies, you stop the car and then something or someone jumps out on you and bludgeons you to death. (I’m sorry but I’ve been dealing with this since our stay and it is good to finally let it all out).
Anyway we finally arrived at the house, we unpacked the car in the pitch black driving rain and ran into the ‘comfort’ of the house.
First impressions were that it was freezing,
second impression was that it smelt (old and musty),
third impression was that it was dirty,
fourth that it was unbelievably creepy
and fifth that I wanted to get out of there immediately. . . And that was before spotting the mould on the ceiling in the bedroom.
I tried to be positive, although I clearly didn’t do a very good job, as husb with false positivity remarked repeatedly that it will all look better in the morning.
It didn’t it just made it easier to see how horrendous it was.
Particular highlights for me included:-
The clear attention to detail to make the place really homely.
(You want clean walls with no holes in you say? – Well now you are just being picky)
And all this is before we get into Scary Movie territory.
I did not sleep a wink on the first night, all I could think of was that no one knew where we were and that anyone could come in and murder us in our beds or worse drag me through the forest Blair Witch Style before murdering me there. (A little dramatic now that I am back in the safety of my Melbourne home but at the time believe me this was all real in my head).
We were booked in for 3 nights of ‘relaxation’, we left after 2 preferring to drive 3 1/2 hours home after husb had run his half marathon than stay another night in Wolf Creek Cottage**
That reminds me, husbs half marathon.
I will have to tell you about that another time, I am too worn out reliving my worst fears coming true, in the middle of nowhere . . . . . Where no one can hear your screams!
**Some names have been changed to protect identities should any of you be crazy enough to want to stay in said scary cottage.