theonlywayismelbourne

Blogging from Down Under

The aliens are coming . . . .

I am feeling pretty good about all things exercise at the moment.  I have managed to get out and work up a sweat and feel like I have properly worked out which is great.
So great in fact that I thought I would share with you my little exercise experience the other day.

I had been for a run/jog round the lake and was feeling pretty good so I thought I would reward myself with  a quick coffee before picking the Bear up from crèche.

I finished off my run with a sprint *ahem* finish and headed straight into the cafe gasping for air breathing deeply only for the young girl behind the counter to visibly step back when she saw me, before recovering herself and hesitatingly offering me a seat with a slightly scared looking smile.

I sat down and as I turned my back towards her to sit down I heard a very audible gasp before again she recovered herself. Seriously what’s wrong with her though I, does she have asthma? Should I be offering her some assistance?

She backed away from me and went about her duties while I had my leisurely coffee and fed baby Bear, all the while the cafe getting busier and people double taking at me as they walked past my table. I thought it odd, but put their lingering looks down to the fact that I had THE cutest child ever and they were clearly just admiring.

Well before I knew it, it was time to set off to pick up the Bear. I nipped to the loo before I headed off and it was there that I caught sight of myself in the mirror.

Ahhh – Now it all made sense!
The sharp intakes of breath.
The double takes from passers-by.
Suddenly I understood.

You see this is what I saw when I looked in the mirror.

The fake human skin is beginning to peel away revealing the alien underneath!

The fake human skin is beginning to peel away revealing the alien underneath!

And this was after I had an hour to cool down – who knows what I looked like when I first got in there.

Aaaaand this is what I saw when I turned round.

Eeek I'm about to sprout spikes a la Wolverine.

Eeek I’m about to sprout spikes a la Wolverine.

Weird marks along my back bone that look like spikes are about to burst through my skin. I mean I know pregnancy changes the body but this is ridiculous!.

And gravel (yes actual floor gravel) stuck and imprinted all the way across my back and shoulders. (No pic, couldn’t do it myself and too embarrassed to ask anyone for fear of scaring them out of their skins ha ha – geddit!) You see the joke is that it wasn’t my skin and . . . Oh never mind!

The penny dropped – now I get it, the sharp intake of breath before recovering herself, the scared looking smile :the kindly waitress was simply attempting to save herself from impending death due to the aliens who are now walking around looking partly human and trying to infiltrate the human race,  killing all those that stand in their spiky backed way.

It was her way of self-preservation.

Hmm maybe I’ve been watching too much ‘V’. (The original series was sooo much better than the remake just saying).

Arghhh Run - save yourself!

Arghhh Run – save yourself!

Maybe I just shouldn’t go out in public. Ever

* I was lying on the ground doing my core exercises and it was very hot so all the gravel got stuck to my back. – Obviously!

What?! It could happen to anyone!

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3 thoughts on “The aliens are coming . . . .

  1. WOW you do go red in the face, but I’m kind of pleased because so do I, and I mean RED like that, it stays for at least an hour after I’ve been doing a hard out workout, mind you it’s been a few years. Thanks for giggle, and I hope your family is here and helping you. GO RHI 🙂

    • 🙂 I think it might even have been purple when I first got there then it ‘calmed down ‘ to red after a bit. I finally started looking human the day after! Glad it’s not just me my alien allay! 🙂

  2. Hahaha! You made me laugh again!

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