theonlywayismelbourne

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I went to the cafe – you’ll never guess what happened next . . . . .

I had a coffee!

What a story eh!

Don’t you just love those click fodder titles though, I saw one the other day and the title was something ridiculous like the one above and turned out to be such a non-story. Well let me assure you people I have one helluva story for you.

Keep reading . . . . .

So I am currently into my weight training ‘it’s all about dem gainz people, it’s all about dem gainz’.

Coupled with this, I am also currently studying to be a Personal Trainer  – I have nearly finished my Cert iii actually and have my practical assessment this weekend. In addition I am also following a Paleo(ish) diet.

Anyway part of my training regime involves me ensuring that I am getting enough protein in order to grow my little baby muscles but I really struggle with the traditional protein shakes (they taste gross) so I have jumped on the ‘Bulletproof’ bandwagon and now after I have been to the gym I make myself a Bulletproof coffee in my mixer shaker thing.

For those unfamiliar with the Bulletproof concept  – you basically put grass fed butter, MCT/Coconut/Brain Octaine Oil and whatever else takes your fancy, into your coffee, whizz it up and Bobs your Uncle –  Bulletproof a go go! Weird as it sounds it tastes really creamy and I have developed a bit of an obsession with it. So much so I have started adding my protein powder to it as well and having it as a post workout protein hit.

So far so weird?!!!

To continue, and provide some background for this story I must let you know that I am currently typing this (while I should be studying) in a busy cafe soaked from head to foot in Bulletproof!

As is everyone in the immediate vicinity to me.

What happened? Well let me fill you in. I’ll be honest,  my obsession got dangerous. I took my trusty shaker to the cafe, ordered my long black with extra hot water, poured it carefully into the shaker, started to shake and  . . . . .

Yep

Everywhere

I thought the top was closed, it was,  but the hot water created some sort of non vacuum meaning hot coffee, butter, oily mixture sprayed all over me and all over every.single.person sat within a 2cm radius of me.

I am sitting here mortified,

stinking of coffee, and,

attempting to style it out!

N.b Very difficult to style it out when you, all those around you and all of your hard written notes, are covered in coffee.

Ashamed!

On a side note though  – Give Bulletproof a try it’s awesome.

And wish me luck for Sunday!

Right I’m going for a shower.

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From Fat to Fit – Planning? Definitely not my strong point.

Since the birth of my baby girl I have been documenting my quest to get back to being ‘me’.

Not just to lose the baby weight that I gained but to get back to feeling fit and strong.

Back in July I posted  this post about the importance to me of having a goal to work towards, so I signed on for the Melbourne Half Marathon.

My first ever half marathon like, ever.

Back in July, October seemed like a looooong time away. I thought, yep, I’ve got this, I’m going to take this half marathon by the scruff of its neck and totally run with it. (Bad pun totally intended). I won’t let this race beat me.

Well yesterday this arrived . . . .

Yeeeeesh!

Yeeeeesh!

Yep, this thing is definitely happening! In 24 days this thing is definitely definitely  happening.

Holy Crap-a-mole.

Did I say it’s definitely happening? Well it totally is.

I have had a few ups and downs with my training and have had to see the physio quite a bit as I have been having problems with my knee which has slowed down my training. At this stage I would have liked to have been comfortably running a good 18k regularly but alas, I had to take it back quite a bit meaning that the longest run I have done is 17k – once.

Today actually.

And it most definitely wasn’t comfortable. My knee started playing up and as I write this I am in quite a lot of pain. Also my right glute muscle decided to down tools and seize up and stop working, meaning the pressure on my knee was even worse. Still I managed to complete a very very slow and, pretty uncomfortable towards the end, training run.

Planning however, is not my strong point. Let me explain.

You see I chose to attempt the longest run of my life today after completing a pretty hard core half hour spin class. I then chose to do the start of my training run with the pretty hard core running teacher who decided she needed to stay with me for the first 5k and pace me. Whiiiiiich was pretty unpleasant, given that her slow pace is my out of breath, stitch inducing fast pace.

Hard core running teacher then got to finish and go and have a nice coffee with the girls while I was left to continue for the next 12k alone but with strict instructions to maintain my out of breath, stitch inducing pace. (I didn’t – but don’t tell her!)

Add to this set of circumstances the small fact that husb had taken the car in for a service today meaning instead of a quick 5 minute drive home, I had to walk, but not just walk, no, I had to take the double pram and push the 3 and 1/2 year old and the 9 month old all the way home. That would be all the 5k home.

See what I mean? Planning clearly not one of my strengths.

So I am now sat on the sofa with a throbbing knee – properly, actually, pooing my pants about whether or not I can in fact do this race.

P.S Not ACTUALLY pooing my pants.

Except I am.

No really I’m not – the smell is totally the 9 month old.

Totally!

The Bear – A week in the life.

Monday: Why is poo brown Mummy?

Tuesday: Why don’t you have a pouch for me to sleep in like the kangaroo Mummy?

Wednesday: Why can’t people walk on the microwave Mummy?
Me: The microwave?
Bear: yes the microwave, where the bridge is.
Me: The microwave, cooks our food.
Bear: no, no where the cars are
Me: do you mean the motorway?
Bear: yes Mummy, the microwave
Bear: why can’t people walk on the microwave Mummy?

Thursday: Can I eat my chalkboard Mummy?

Friday: I have a headache in my trousers Mummy.

Saturday: Where is England Mummy?
Bear: Is it in America Mummy?
Bear: Is it in Australia Mummy?
Bear: Mummy, is England in Melbourne?

Sunday: How did Florence get in your tummy Mummy?
Mummy?
Mummy?
Mama?
Muuuuuuuuuuuuuum?

Me: Ask your father.

Celebrating the #littlevictories

Since husb and I started to change our eating habits, moving away from sugary processed foods and working towards a ‘cleaner’ diet, free from chemical nasties, preservatives, ingredients I can’t pronounce and refined sugar there is absolutely no doubt that we both feel and look better for it.

Did I mention that husb jumped on my paleo bandwagon too and is really feeling the benefit? No? Well he did . . . And he is!

Which brings me to the Bear.
We have never fed him particularly badly in the scheme of things considering what he could be eating, but now that I am much more aware of hidden sugars and yucky chemical flavour enhancers and preservatives in foods it has made me really look at what we are feeding him. Just one look at some of the foods marketed at kids these days is enough to shock you, most of the ingredients I wouldn’t even recognise as actual foodstuffs.

Read more…

I confess – I’ve been having an affair

Bless me blog readers for I have sinned, it has been too long since my last confession and the weight of guilt weighs heavy on my heart. I must get it off my chest, I must assuage the guilt.

I could give you all sorts of excuses, I was lonely, my husb doesn’t understand me; but the truth is, it was all me.
I started the whole thing. It was upon my selfish insistence that my loving husb finally gave in simply to make me happy. And how do I repay him?

By having an affair.

Read more…

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